Me and Jeff have been looking for awesome summer interns for Fluxcapacity here in NYC. We’ve been getting some resumes from people, but one from Tim Duncan caught my eye. I was really excited until I found out it was sent in by Adam! Here it is:
<resume>
OBJECTIVE
To find a position where I have the ability develop my fundamentals, and build on top of my previous ten years experience using those fundamentals. Also, to bring said fundamentals to an industry and company sorely lacking in that area.
EDUCATION
- Wake Forest University Winston-Salem, North Carolina Psychology Major 1993 – 1997
- St. Dunstan’s Episcopal High School St. Croix, United States Virgin Islands 1998 to 2002
EXPERIENCE
San Antonio Spurs, San Antonio, Texas
Power forward/Center, September 1997 to Present
- Took the game to an all new level of excitement with my post, dribble, shoot style of basketball.- Angered a stadium full of fans by just looking straight ahead.
- NBA Rookie of the year.
- Three-Time NBA Finals Most Valuable Player Award Winner.
- Two-time NBA Most Valuable Player Award Winner.
FOAO (Fundamentals of America Org), San Antonio, Texas
Founder, September 2004 to July 2006
- Demonstrated to youth all over America the benefits of fundamental basketball.
- Ran meetings with the president of the United States about fundamentals on the battlefield.
- Demonstrated the art of killing ones enemies through boredom by playing fundamental basketball, a technique being used in Afghanistan and Iraq today in operation “Un-Shock and Un-Awe”.
Face Modeling for the Expressionless Inc. San Antonio, Texas
Founder, CEO, and President, December 1997 to September 2004
- Held the world record for longest held expressionless face.
- Inspired 500 expressionless people around the world to pose for the “1999 Collage of the Expressionless”.
- Helped found the “Expressionless Hall of Fame”.
- Identified possible inductees into the “Expressionless Hall of Fame”.
- Made the front cover of “Expressionless Magazine” four years in a row.
- Became the first modeling agency to sign Greg Oden, an up and coming in the expressionless world, when he was only 9 years old.
Dumb Face for Smart People LLC. San Antonio, Texas
President, May 1999-September 2002
- Helped reduce the oppression against those with “Dumb Faces” around the world.
- Helped push a bill through congress to take down segregation of people with smart faces and dumb faces in the west.
- Set up the Dumb Face Smart Person Awareness program.
</resume>
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