Month: August 2007

  • Beckham inspires intensity during MLS match … and afterwards

    On Saturday I went to the LA Galaxy vs New York Red Bulls match. Beckham helped bring over 60,000 people to the stadium. We got to the match a bit late because of traffic and the stadium was packed.

    Beckham had already setup two goals by the time we got to our seats. From there on out, the game was fast paced and back and forth. There were a total of 9 goals scored in the game, and it was close the whole way. The Galaxy tied up the game with 5 minutes left at 4-4, and then the Red Bulls put in the clincher with just minutes left in the game. Definitely worth the $50. I think a lot of people in NYC came just to boo Beckham, which happened every time he attempted a free kick or a corner kick.

    After the game we hung out in the parking lot drinking beers and playing soccer rather than waiting in the lines to get out. While playing, someone accidentally kicked a ball under a car with a man and woman in it and Justin went to go get it. We thought nothing of it at the time.

    A bit later we moved and someone told me to watch out for these plastic bags that were sort of in our way. So I went over the bag and gave it a kick expecting it to move a foot or two. What I didn’t know was this bag was filled with water and it sailed a good 20 to 30 feet and smushed onto the window of a car (luckily their window was closed). I stood for a second in shock not understanding what had just happened, and then I ran over to the driver side window of the car to apologize profusely.

    Of course, it was the same man and woman from before! Then, out of nowhere, the woman burst out of the car and ran over to Justin and shoved him hard and started yelling at him in German accented English. She kept saying something to the effect of, “this is a parking lot, not a football field!” Alex immediately got in her face telling her to back off and asking her why she shoved Justin. I was still apologizing over near the man, who was still sitting in his seat with his seatbelt on. I’m not sure why he didn’t get out to yell at us or at least corral in his crazy girlfriend or wife. The lady finally got into her car and they drove off.

    That’s when the ridiculousness of the situation dawned on us and we started laughing our asses off. What we couldn’t figure out is why exactly she pushed Justin instead of pushing me, the actual kicker of the plastic bag. One theory was that Justin is my karma whipping boy, so anything I do wrong will end up in his lap. Another theory was that the women was in love with Justin, and when she realized she couldn’t have him she snapped.

    In my opinion, she was inspired by Beckham’s play on the field and brought her A game to the parking lot.

  • Death of a Nod Relationship

    Me and office doorman during the day used to have an understanding. As I walked in he would make eye contact and I would give him a friendly nod to let him know I’m one of the good ones in the building. This easy relationship has existed for a few months now, but now it’s been destroyed.

    The building has this rule that big packages are required to be brought through the freight elevator which is closed from 12 to 1. Unfortunately the big packages rule also applies to bikes, and since I bike to work I have to make sure not to get to the office in this interval. Lately I’ve been getting here with plenty of time to spare, but one day I got in at 12:30. I figured it wouldn’t be a big deal so I tried to go through the front entrance. I tried the ole friendly nod, but instead I got a head shake from side to side. I plead my case, trying to cite precedent, Plessy vs Ferguson, and other law terms I got from Law and Order to no effect. I told him I’d wait until nobody was using the elevators, or that I’d use the stairs up to the second floor and then go up, but still nothing. Then finally I decided to just stand in the lobby in silent protest. After a little bit of time he caved and he let me up.

    I figured we were still cool, but the next day when I walked in I looked over at him, but I got no eye contact just a stare straight ahead. Now I guess I just have to wait and see if he tells other door people at the building or in NYC. I hope it’s not like in Curb Your Enthusiasm where Larry David gets the cold shoulder from the entire lesbian community.

    While on the subject of nods, I need to ask people about an interesting phenomenon in the Indian community of the US. Especially when I was in Michigan, every time I saw another Indian person I would get (and give) a nod.  Me and my sister called it the Indian nod. Here in NYC I don’t get it quite as often but it still happens.

    What I’m wondering is if there’s other ethnic nods. For example a Chinese nod, or a German nod in the United States. My hypothesis is that this nod only occurs among a relatively new population of immigrants to the US, especially if they’re in a more remote area like Michigan instead of Chicago or NYC.

  • To the guy whose ass I mistakenly grabbed at Happy Endings

    A couple of weeks ago I was at Happy Endings bar with one of my really good friends from college Sean and some of his friends.

    Side note: Me and Sean met at South Quad where we started an underground poker ring that grew to ridiculous proportions. People would come up to me and Sean in the street asking about our poker game, random older non-students would show up to the games, and at one game we had over $1500 in the pot. Luckily we got out of the game right before it got busted by all the RAs.

    So anyways while Sean was talking/dancing with some girl I was talking to his friend Jen. She was telling me how a lot of times guys will purposely brush against girls in the bar. I disagreed and we decided to set up a little social experiment. She stood with her back facing the “walking lane” and I was watching to see if any guys actually did what she claimed. At least 5 guys walked by with nothing happening. Then she said that it was because I was watching. So I sort of turned a bit and pretended not to be looking, but was still talking to her.

    Then, this guy walked past her while we were talking about something else, and I heard her say, “that was really bad!” I thought she was referring to the guy grabbing her ass. Being a lover not a fighter, I decided that the only logical course of action was to grab his ass as a sort of punishment. Obviously if she did it back to him, it would be good for him, not a punishment, so I figured I’d take one for the team. Keep in mind that my judgment was somewhat impaired by alcohol. So I grabbed his ass and he turned around and looked at Jen with an interested look. That was when I said, “no buddy, that was me!” His look of shock was pretty hilarious. That’s when Jen pulled me away and said, “it wasn’t him!”.

    A wave of shock, sadness and regret washed over me. It was definitely a “what have I done!” moment. I looked around for the guy so I could apologize and explain, but he was gone.

    So now I’ve got bad karma for a while. If you’re somehow reading this guy whose ass I mistakenly grabbed, I’m sorry! Let this be a lesson to everyone else – avoid vigilante justice!

  • If you could have only one super-power, what would it be… and how would you use it?

    I would want the power to be able to learn and understand any concept/idea instantly and remember it forever. So if I happened to be going to Hungary I could learn Magyar just by picking up a book on it. Or if I wanted to learn everything related to game theory I could.

       

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  • Check out this song….

    My friend Apoorva just put up this sweet rap song about the Brown Jug in Ann Arbor. Check it out! I met him freshman year of college and then we randomly ended up in a mechanical engineering class together. I took the class not knowing that it was sort of a weeder class for ME, and Apoorva helped me get through it.

  • Which celebrity would you most want to do volunteer work with?

    Definitely Larry David. Although instead of volunteering with him, I’d pretty much just ask him to help me come up with a set of rules to avoid awkwardness.

       

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  • Michael Vick has been indicted for running dog fights. If guilty, what should his punishment be?

    I would say that for every year of life that was stolen from each of the dogs on his property, he should spend a year in jail.

       

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  • I just got this slew of messages from my cousin Anil:

    [17:47] [hisimname]: I am iming you from my ps3
    [17:47] [hisimname]: are you impressed?
    [17:48] [hisimname]: I turned my ps3 into a linux computer
    [17:48] [hisimname]: try it with the wii
    [17:49] [hisimname]: I am sure it might get to the boot screen for linux before it explodes
    [17:49] [hisimname]: I love you
    [17:49] [hisimname]: good day
    [17:54] *** “[hisimname]” signed off at Wed Aug 01 17:54:09 2007.

    Oh man, he cracks me up. He’s basically as big as me and my cousin Sharat put together.